Just Say No….

Last night I went to see a band play. I was rather annoyed because MR.KNIGHTLY left me hanging for about an hour for a ride. I ended up going without him though and arriving about an hour late. FRIEND-S was waiting inside but before I even got out of my car, before I even got my door open all the way, one foot out the door—on the ground.

DRUNK-LADY: Will you drive me somewhere?

ME: What? Hi…

DRUNK-LADY: please, will you drive me somewhere? I’ll have to walk!  *pouty face*

ME: uhh…no…

DRUNK-LADY: please please please will you drive me.

(at this point she is hanging on my door and stopping me from getting out. She is a smaller women and I can tell she is blitzed out of her mind. ARG. My mind thinks about her safety walking alone down the street. I think about her being cold and getting sick or hurt. AND then I think about doing the right thing…what is the right thing? I cannot say no….)

ME: Okay. Get in.

DRUNK-LADY: oh thank you thank you I love you…you are amazing!

ME: My name is _______ by the way….

DRUNK-LADY: I am so drunk.

ME: really…couldn’t tell.

DRUNK-LADY: Cindy—my name is Cindy.

ME: If I take you to this place will you have a ride home? Will you get there safe?

DRUNK-LADY: *starts to cry* My husband is an asshole.

ME: *nervous* uh… was he there? Why are you with him if he is an ass?

DRUNK-LADY: no he wasn’t there he through all my things outside because I wanted to drink tonight.

(Great I picked up an alcoholic—because I’ve worked with alcoholics and this is what they sound like.)

DRUNKLADY: No…no…I’ll find a ride home. I will find SOMEONE to take me home.

(me thinking oh God…please let me be taking her somewhere away from her own car)

DRUNK-LADY: Do you have 2$ I could borrow.

ME: no.

(I have 20$ in my pocket—but it’s costing me 5$ to drive you across town…chica… AND thinking she’ll use it for more booze of COURSE I SAY NO!)

DRUNK-LADY: Really not even 2$?

ME: no… no cash.

DRUNK-LADY: He threw all my stuff outside because I wanted to drink tonight. Don’t marry a man like mine—he’s such an asshole.

ME: ah.

DRUNK-LADY: Thank you for driving me you are beautiful. I love you.

ME: You would say that I am driving you.

DRUNK-LADY: Do you know you are beautiful?

ME: thanks.

DRUNK-LADY: You got a dollar?

ME: No.

DRUNK-LADY: you don’t even got a dollar?

ME: No I don’t I have money for me to see the band that I wanted to go see—before you came to my car door.

DRUNK-LADY: oh…it’s like that.

*REALLY????*

ME: yes.

I went 30 minutes out of my way to drive her. When she got out I checked for my wallet and my phone—I also looked around for other things in my car that she could have taken. When I got back, the bouncer, my friend said, I kicked her out. HA. I wish I had made it inside. I think I could have said no to her. Maybe. Hey, I said no to the dollar right?

I complicate my life sometimes. It isn’t the first time I have offered a complete stranger a ride. However, usually I have a pretty strong intuition about people. She was just a sad drunk. Even so—what would Jesus do? Perhaps he wouldn’t be out late on a school night to see a band. BUT if he was would he forgo being on time to give a woman a ride across town even though he didn’t know her?  I wonder if he would have given her the money? I don’t think Jesus would be an enabler. However, is driving someone across town enabling? At what point are you doing too much for someone? At what point are you not doing enough? A question I struggle with almost daily.

The band started late anyway. Didn’t even start till 10 minutes after I got there.  Nothing lost–except maybe DRUNK-LADY’S self control.

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About HAJ

poet,teacher,tree-hugger...
This entry was posted in Friendship, relationships and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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